How do you deal with a difference in personality? I was raised to be on time or earlier than the appointed time to meet. And when you have an event coming up plan for it. Well how do you deal with people that are so totally opposite??? I have been trying to figure out a way to do this since my husband and I got married. You wouldn't think it would be such an annoying character until you really have to deal with it. For instance, my family celebrates EVERY holiday or just about anything to have a reason to get together. His family just recently in the past 3-4 years decided to celebrate xmas, mothers, fathers and thanksgiving.. So it makes life a little hard especially since i come from divorced parents. So we now have to do lunch, dinner and whatever we make it to. Well those are just something I am sure we'll figure out which I am hoping will be the 'eve' of everything. But for birthdays these days are always the same the date never changes just maybe the day. My IL's like to plan things the totally last minute.. And when something gets planned early (mind you this means 2 days before) they usually change. Well I am guessing that they still don't get that I usually have plans for the weekend weeks or months before.. so if we are lucky they will call the day before.. but normally my SIL will call my hubby and say hey we are getting together for mom's birthday. Which is nice and we are like okay. When? For lunch today.. Which means an hour or two from when they are calling. I don't think they realize that we live in Sunnyvale and have to drive to eitehr san francisco or oakland. but before that usually have to drop off the dog and all three of us have to get ready and straighten up before we leave the house. so we are talking at least 2 hours of getting ready and making sure that M doesn't need to be fed and getting his diaper bag ready. And they are rarely on time. But when we decide oh it's okay to be late they are all waiting for us. WTF?!?!@?!?!?!
So my question of the day is HOW DO YOU DEAL WITH LATE PLANNERS??? This is a constant battle between my husband and I. And I have tried inquiring ahead of time and seeing what they are going to do but no one ever knows the answer. Or assume that we'll hold the event at our place.. ummm no thanks.. my nephew and neice are out of control and i rather not have them over thanks very much. and we have my other families to see/visit.
So what should I do but I guess be prepared.. Since it was Chinese New Year I blocked off Saturday and Sunday thinking that maybe we'll be seeing them. But I don't look forward to seeing them or getting together all that much. When we are there it's better. And thank god i get along with them but i still have this thing because they plan so late.
2 comments:
hey! em and i are like that too. i tend to wait til the last minute and em needs to have her schedule down or it throws her for a tizzy. but i think we've both improved in that aspect. em is much more patient with me and i try to think ahead logistically when it comes to family stuff. i do plan very well when it comes to my own personal things such as consulting and golf/basketball/bowling events, but when it comes to planning with others i'm still learning. just make sure to compliment d when he does something right. compliments make us want keep doing and keep trying to be better.
well it's not really d as much as his family that cause a lot of arguments.. they just don't have it together and wait until the last minute
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